Dan Hamill Is A Cocksucker

After a lengthy absence, I found myself in Los Angeles once again. It was the longest stretch (6 months plus) I have been away from the City of Anals since I began going regularly in the previous century. I admit to a certain longing for the town, based not of course in any appreciation for the city itself, but based in the people I spend the time with there as well as the little places I have discovered over the years that bring me joy when away (such as Centerfold, the best magazine stand in town, Meltdown Comics, and Bob's Donuts, which was literally my first stop arriving).

Before I get into anything, very special thanks to Paul at Tokyopop (for whom yours truly might be doing a manga for in the very near future), who hooked your man up with the Japan only Star Wars manga anthologies that I had been dying for. That was a nice surprise from a really nice guy (read more about the manga here: http://www.starwars.com/eu/lit/comics/news20051222.html) How they can't release this awesomeness here is beyond me.

I won't bore you with the specifics of the trip, meaning, I won't bore you with the endless yet productive meetings and such that occupied the bulk of my time. However, my first evening back in LA saw my tired ass, accompanied by the ever wonderful lawyer/agent/advisor (who, by the way, is making big strides in the LA), return to the centerpiece of every LA trip, the home of my favourite pasta dish, the Agnolotti: CA'BREA. It was a quiet Monday night and my friends who own the place are home most evenings now with thier newborn (congrats), but heartbreak quickly set in when it was revealed to me by a waiter, of whom I was known to as "Mr. Agnolotti" for the last several years, that they no longer made said Agnolotti. Heartbreak. I was actually told this: "You haven't been here in six months, why would they keep making it?" For real. Anyhow, I can't hold this against them as it is still the best place in LA, so my new policy is to order something on the menu each time I go there until I find a new favourite. My first choice, Gnocci in a veal and beef ragu, was a great start. Anyhow, it's still the best. Go.

Tuesday was catch up with the old school day. Sleep was at a premium, but I found myself having an early breakfast with former aggression vocalist turned co-creator of Kruger Baby Cuteness, who's own adventures in LA (for a mere few hours) coincided with yours truly. Here he is looking pretty bad ass: As usual, I came armed with gifts purchased by my significant other for said babies and Kruger and I, as always, had a good laugh and a good time, and now that he, wife and the double cuteness are stationed on the East Coast for the summer, we should be spending some time. Aces. Here we have the Kruger Baby Cuteness the very next day on their way to the East Coast

Continuing the theme of baby goodness, another solid reunion was had when I found myself fortunate enough to spend an evening with Bradley J. Fox and family, who I have not seen in ages as well. Boy, has Isabella grown. So cute too, and thankfully starting to look a bit like her mother and less like a Cramp clone! ;-). Our time (like my time with everyone on this trip) was brief, but man it was good to catch up with the Cramps. I would like to especially thank Mrs. Cramp for her stories pertaining to a certain TV star who directed a really good movie about two years ago which had me rolling on the floor in laughter (and later made Lurch cry when I told him via phone).

Wednesday was just as chaotic, obviously I am skipping specifics, but it was another whirlwind day. However at lunch, I actually had agnolotti at Ca Del Sole while dining with writer of recent movie I worked on that some of you saw last year, and it was very good. So I felt that was karma, but if you want to get into good food, let's discuss my evening with Irene's mom, who spoiled my ass like a champ and took me for some very serious Korean food that was the top notch. You can't ask for a better mother-in-law who feeds you like this on a regular basis and only asks for pictures of her daugthers and grandson in return. I am developing this severe love of Korean food and for Koreatown, which I feel is an awesome place to explore during my further adventures in LA. It's nice to find a part of LA that has some culture, you know? Anyhow, Irene's mom is awesome and fun to hang out with and always takes good care of me, and it was a perfect end to a crazy trip.

While this was all going on, Busy-B was sending in demos left and right from the previous recording session. The progress is huge. the jump in quality is significant and the PLO demo has some gems in it that we will unmine in time. We're getting there kids.

Back in NYC, Irene and I spent the anniversary of her third year living at MOGworld. We did this by eating well and simply hanging out cause in the end, that's all that matters. I have to give her props cause she delivered the best fucking present ever: she enrolled me in the BACON OF THE MONTH CLUB. Here's how it is described on its own website "The Bacon of the Month Club is the greatest of all gifts. I’m not making that up. I get calls from customers all the time that tell me this. In my humble opinion no other club in the universe gives you as much pleasure and sheer delight as The Bacon of the Month Club. The Bacon of the Month Club is the go-to gift for that person in your life who loves bacon, who has everything or who has very little. Join for yourself. Give yourself the gift of bacon." Here's what you get:

Twelve different artisan bacon delivered to your door each month*
Informative notes on all bacon selections
Discounts on Grateful Palate bacon products and bacons
Bacon of the Month Club Membership Card
The Bacon Strip—Our monthly bacon comic strip for members only
The Bacon of the Month Club Pig Ballpoint Pen
A Little Rubber Toy Pig
One free Bacon Tee-Shirt

This was the best gift ever. For real. Not something to get for Gentile.

Yesterday was my little cousin's First Communion. These church things are scary and happen way the hell too early in the day. My recollection of it was dim after I woke up at the commuinion afterparty, which was in a hotel banquet room (why I don't know), but the kids danced and had fun, and there was homemade chocolate goodies and fresh iced tea, so scores all around. However, I was fascinated by what else was going on at the hotel conference rooms and wanted to attend this one: However, by the time we got there, it was over (retirees retire early I guesss). And then we went home and relaxed. A lot. zzzzzz.

Today, I had breakfast with G and Lurch at Shopsins. It was what you expect from brunch with these men: Good food, lots of high quality laughs, and of course, the fun company. However, nothing was better than when G dropped his glass drinking cup to the floor, thus making a loud noise. Lurch's friend who runs the place promptly scolded G in the middle of the entire place by saying VERY loudly: "YOU COCKSUCKER", which brought a huge pop from Lurch and I and some shocked looks from parents out for the mother's day brunch. However, when he realized that G's glass didn't break and there was no serious mess, the guy quickly announced that G was LESS of a cocksucker for not causing as big a mess as initially thought. This was a classic. Learn more about Danny and his roommate, the KIDD, at www.streetblowjobs.com. then we record shopped with B before I spent the rest of my day with Irene.

I had a lot more to tell you about my week, but fuck is this long or what. My apologies if I skipped anything or anyone. Finally, in other news: One step further to stardom, MURRAY makes his filmed debut HERE: http://donttouchmethere.com/video_pages/svu.php

Night.

F

EVAN IS THE VIRGIN BOXING CHAMP (and other weekend stories)

Friday night was boys night. Irene was off at the Guggenheim and I knew if the guys and I didn't see MISSION IMPOSSIBLE on that very night, there was a chance we would never see it at all. I know that sounds wack, and I know what I am about to say sounds weird, but sometimes, in my non musical line of work, there are just movies I have to see in order to remain up to date. Big franchise movies happen to be what I am associated with, so obviously, seeing the first big movie of the Summer was important. For the record, I like Tom Cruise. I don't hate him and I really don't give a shit about his personal crap and the Scientology and all that, but I think he gets a bum rap because he really is the biggest fucking movie star on the planet. No actor opens movies worldwide like he does. Also for the record, I HATE the first two M.I. movies. They suck. Hard. With this franchise, Cruise seems to rape good directors. I don't know why, probably too hands on, so I went into this movie with very little enthusiasm. I was actually more excited to see the SUPERMAN trailer on the big screen and guess, what, screwed! They didn't play it, but we got the new Pirates trailer (INCREDIBLE) and the brand new Nacho Libre trailer which shows this movie could be a winner (the last trailer didn't do it for me). Also we got the 007 trailer, which I am cautiously excited about.

Anyhow, MI3 turns things around and doesn't suck. It was a nice surprise. Is it great? Not by any means, but J.J. Abrams brings a nice kinetic feel to the franchise and keeps it sharp, fresh and delivers on the action. Cruise is Cruise and thats all you need here. Of course, the genius of Phillip Hoffman is off the charts and he seemingly improvises his entire role to great effect. Its the first good bad guy of the franchise. He steals it, of course, and has fun doing son. He's never over the top campy, he keeps it right and plays nicely off the Cruise. It's basically a rehash of the first movie's plot, but done right. Summer is off to a good start.

We then hopped over to Osteria Al Doge on 44th street for a nice manly eye-talian dinner. It was laid back and tasty. After, we took a stroll to the midtown Virgin to check out some CD's and then proceeded to rock out on the instore Xbox 360 Boxing game, in which Evan (who has an unfair advantage) took on all challengers and won (that includes us AND strangers who wanted to challenge him). Evan also wore camo shorts I might add. Let's leave it at that. Also speaking of leaving it at that, you will note below that I actually went out in public not only with a man in camo shorts who has no leg hair, but also with a man wearing a Martha Wainright Tshirt.

It's not so much him wearing it than it is him having bought it. Who the fuck is like "OH MY GOD I NEED A MARTHA WAINRIGHT TSHIRT"? Well, the answer is Lurch, who I strangely respect for doing so. I miss the old days when it was just Danny wearing white jeans, but that was Earth 1 Danny, who I don't miss and was kind of a dick (that's all for another day). Evan, having a migraine (possibly caused by the lack of masculine pants), headed home, so Danny, Lurch and I proceeded to go to our fave midtown west side dive, The Bellvue...

Except, it was fucking GONE. GONE. Closed. All signs of this dive erased forever. We were not pleased. At all. We then took refuge at some place called Holland and G and Lurch began asking questions about the disappearance of Bellvue. They uncovered some stories, but basically it was absorbed into another bar, Siberia, around the corner (which we almost went to before Holland, but one of them thought it was gay night, as if that was a bad thing), after it was learned some "bad things" were done to the bar. I have no fucking clue what that means, but quicker than you can say "stick it", we were at Siberia which is much larger than Bellvue, has live music downstairs, but keeps the dive vibe alive, including the way too loud jukebox that contains Ministry's Greatest Fits. All we want are couches and we got that, so we were happy. We need to break this place in a bit, I think, but Rest In Peace Bellvue, you were loved.

I kept my drinking limited as it was a go-time the next day at the studio, where Charles and Ash made their triumphant return to the HF camp. The purpose: to get Charles' low end goodness on a few songs.

To say it was a productive day woud be an understatement. I anticipated getting Charles on two songs, but we got lucky and go thim on three: OUR FAITH, EXIST, and CLEAN UP, all of which now sound beyond fierce and beyond anything I could imagine. But despite that, it was great having people around. B and I have been too deep into the trenches as of late, so having some fresh bodies to play with was exciting. We clowned around, we taked shop, had some Thai (food), and drank fresh brewed caffiene awesomeness (Observe young Brandt here, displaying his teabagging skills).



We laughed, we laughed harder, we busted each others chops and in the end, got the job done. the bonus was the four of jamming on a track we started ages (years) ago, and coming up with ideas for what will be the post-E.S. HF project. Right now, this song is called P.L.O (Thanks, Damon), but will eventually change. It was a great day for band morale and for the music, which is going to knock you on your ass. I promise.

And tomorrow, for the first time in 6 plus months, I am off to Los Angeles, California for a few jam packed days. This is the longest I have ever been from the west Coast in this century. While I am no fan of the city, I am a fan of several who live there and hope to see a few of them. Even the co-creator of KRUGER BABY AWESOMENESS will be joing me for an early breakfast. Speaking of which, this is one awesome Kruger:



Today was a light day. While Lurch was fucking me and G over by going to brunch without us, I spent some time with Peter Saintface, who is always a welcome presence. After getting the Saintface update, B and I took a stroll to Rebel Rebel to buy our weekly music quota (yes we still buy CD's you filesharing anus). Today I got some stuff for Irene and got myself the Dirty Pretty Things album and a new 80's dance compilation put together by two fifths of the Durans. Good for the plane ride tomorrow. As I type we are about to watch the sequel to the Russian vampire movie Night Watch (I believe reviewed here on the blog somewhere), which is called Day Watch. Irene scored a copy, so we're gonna check it out. Hopefully it will be Russian good.

Anyhow, Good times ahead. Oh, also, I know there are a lot of internet rumours that RAW is broadcasting from Anaheim tomorrow night and I just "happen" to be in Los Angeles on the same day. Let me put it to rest that I will not be appearing tomorrow night, despite what many appear to be saying. Plus, The Backyard Icon will still be in NY and do you think I would appear without him? Please, bitch.

LUCAS LISTENS

"In response to overwhelming demand, Lucasfilm Ltd. and Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment will release attractively priced individual two-disc releases of Star Wars, The Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi. Each release includes the 2004 digitally remastered version of the movie, as well as the original theatrical edition of the film. That means you'll be able to enjoy Star Wars as it first appeared in 1977, Empire in 1980, and Jedi in 1983.

See the title crawl to Star Wars before it was known as Episode IV; see the pioneering, if dated, motion control model work on the attack on the Death Star; groove to Lapti Nek or the Ewok Celebration song like you did when you were a kid; and yes, see Han Solo shoot first.

This release will only be available for a limited time: from September 12th to December 31st. International release will follow on or about the same day. Each original theatrical version will feature Dolby 2.0 Surround sound, close-captioning, and subtitles in English, French and Spanish for their U.S. release. International sound and subtitling vary by territory."

THE KIDD IS NOW 26 YEARS OLD (aka I THINK THE FACT THAT YOU OWE ME $1,400 FOR AN APARTMENT I CAN'T SLEEP IN IS IRONIC)

It was a weekend of living large and eating well and spending time with good folks. I don't even know how to catch up as I am hard pressed to remember where the fuck I have been. I remember Irene and I eating Sushi last Thursday with Chad and his family and eating lots of Ice Cream in his backyard. That was fun.

REALLY fun was the Kidd's birthday celebration at RUTH's CRIS STEAKHOUSE, which the young man had never been to. Upon hearing this recently, Irene suggested we dine there when he became an adult. Well, it finally happened on the 27th and on the 28th, the young man lived large, drinking French Wine and eating fine Filet. He was joined by Irene and myself as well as MOGpac members G-sus, Matt Gentile (in a rare and most welcome appearance), and the legednary tallness of Lurch.

I believe this is the first time I have seen Lurch and Matt in the same room and not giving each other Ric Flair chops. This was a superfine meal that cost many bills and was worth every single penny. Dining with MOG is fun.

We then went to a bar, which I have now been to twice and still don't know the name of, but is often referred to as "The bar we went to that night with Murray".
The Kidd's evening criteria was a place where we can sit, that had a good jukebox, and was low key. The Bar We Went To That Night With Murray fit that criteria perfectly and the jukebox has improved tremendously. Hearing Pulp after a few drinks was very refreshing. As you can see from these photos, we were seated, not crowded, and there were brick walls, so all were happyWe were then joined by a young woman named Leigh, who claims to be involved with the Kidd on some romantic level. My personal opinions regarding the legitimacy of these claims is unimportant, but we didn't seem to scare the girl too much. It was a good time. Danny, being gracious to the child and is ParaMOUR, agreed to stay at MOGworld and leave the Astoria MOG location to the kidd and young love.

Saturday saw G and I have a morning video conference call with my nephew (who was with Evan in Montreal), who proceeded to call G a "bastard" and enjoyed watching me punch my fellow Gold Street Superstar in the peanuts. After a quick Gramercy breakfast with G, I went to Brandts to work on music. Brandt has added shelves, as seen here. We decided to work on DESCRIPTIVE, which is actually a post-Exit Strategies track that the full band worked on (while I was in LA) and then I arranged and added to over the last year or so. I began the arrangment for our current set up, but technical problems sent B into a frenzy and we then scooted off to the record store to pick up the latest hits (and so he could cool off). For the record, I have continued work on the song here at MOGworld using the new bass and of course the trusty Irish Keyboard. However, the following photo is for a certain bandmember who is quite the geek when it comes to tech and racks:


Yeah.

Saturday night was an early and again fancy ass dinner, this time at Blue Water Grill to celebrate the alleged 39th anniversary of the people who allegedly brought me into this world. Do you believe it? Anyway, Wine was consumed, Oysters were sucked down, swordfish was blackened, and to make sure things were decadant enough, Chococlate Fondue was the dessert. it was lovely and parents are really the only people you can give pictures of yourself to without actually having to be famous. I like that. No autographs please. Then Irene and I promptly slept for like days as we were burnt out.

Sunday saw Irene and I hit the Tribecca Film Fest for a morning of Short Films. Afterwards we went down to my old block, Sullivan Street, and dined Al Fresco at the tiny yet awesome Pasta joint Pepe Rosso which Irene had been wanting me to try. We then spent the afternoon in Soho and Chinatown, just hanging out, shopping, etc. and just enjoying the nice weather and a quiet day (rare). We then caught up with Lurch at and went to the movies to see STICK IT, hoping it could be the next BRING IT ON (same writer). Sadly, it's not, but there's a great scene at the end which seemed incredibly improvised at the last minute and features an apparantly drunk Jeff Bridges being brought in from the bar to come up with some emotional bits. Not a very memorable movie, but the following is a memorable post-movie moment that needs no words:



Since then, I have been keeping the usual insanity happening and excitement builds for the first HF band session featuring Charles and Ash for what seems like YEARS, which will happen this Saturday. I am off to LA for a few days on Monday so having the lads come in will be a great way shot of energy for the masterpiece that will be the first HF full-length. SCORE.

F

WILLIAM SHATNER CAN WIN MORE EMMYS NOW.

From The Hollywood Reporter: David E. Kelley's dramedy "Boston Legal" will return for a third season. Sources said ABC has given a full-season pickup to the show from David E. Kelley Prods. and 20th Century Fox TV. The series, starring William Shatner, James Spader and Candice Bergen, is slated to end its sophomore season with a two-hour finale May 16.